Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Overdue

I am very frustrated with baby #1. Not knowing how having a baby is supposed to be has made things so difficult. Couldn't Heavenly Father implanted in us an inherent knowledge of how it is supposed to be? It might have made things easier. So now I am a week overdue and will be induced on Thursday. I've been to the hospital 3 times thinking "this is it!" only to be sent back. How annoying. I am worried that I will get there to be induced and nothing will progress and I will have to have a c-section. That is one reason I am not having my baby in Guatemala because 90% of the babies born are born by c-section and I don't want to be cut open! I've never had surgery in my life and I don't want to start now. I just hope it all works out and he is born naturally. Also this prolonging has brought people out of the woodwork asking me everyday "is he born yet?" I just want to be left alone. I don't want to answer that question a gazillion times, yes I know "over-exaggeration", but come on people. I want him here just as much as you. But I can't force the hospital to give me the potocin or to pull him out. Everyone actually has been telling me not to be induced because it is bad for the baby. Please people.... I am very grateful to my mom who has been there for me through this. I wish my husband was here to but that is another long post about how slow our government is and really I don't even want to go there. Another issue where everyone knows more than me. Again people: everyone is different! Ugh! I've never received more unsolicited comments or advice in my life. So here I am ready to have this baby and bring him into this wonderful world to gain a body and teach him all that I know and I must wait. Only a few more days!! I pray!!