Mundane

So this summer was not at all what I expected it to be. Don't take me wrong it has been full of fun but not as much as I had hoped. I've gone boating that was on my checklist and hung out with friends, gone to baseball games, etc. I even painted my room and read the last Harry Potter book in one day. I still have the Moab trip to look forward to so there is still hope. Yesterday when I was headed to the Bees game we were attacked by golfball sized hail! Yes in July!! But we made and the game was rained out. So we will be back next Monday. So I guess there is some excitement but not a ton. There is still a month left this summer so I'll just wait and see.

Gone

The lady that I was taking care of past away! I have seen too much death in my short life. Now my Grandma Rivers may not be around soon. Good news my brother Matt went on his mission to Indiana. I am happy for him.

What a year!

Well it has been a year since I came to Utah. I can't believe I've made it this far. One thing that I realized it no matter how much we love our family it really is our friends that get us through life. I love my family very much but they just can't be there for me. And it's not that I live far away because even when I lived near them they just weren't there for me. I really don't know why. Maybe because I have been so independant my whole life...who knows. But if I did not have the support system that I do here in Ogden then I don't think I could have made it through losing a dear friend(not dead just now not friends), my grandfather dying unexpectedly, a grandfather figure dying, getting through this job and all the drama that comes with it, and my birthday that I was so determined to have fun on. It was the best day ever!!!!!!! Best birthday ever!!!!!!! I was throwing a party and then my friends took me to a Jazz game! We lost but just being there was so great! Then we came home to cake and ice cream and watched Rear Window. Best time ever watching that movie...usually I fall asleep. It has just been great. Life is good. The only thing I am regretting and don't know how to fix is losing my friendship with Deborah. I realize I do miss her. But I know she doesn't think of me ever. She never really cared for me that way. I guess I'm too emotional and I get too attached. It's wierd friends that I can still call friends but never see I don't miss. I guess because I know they are always there. But with Deborah I do miss her. We had fun and really I know what happened but don't understand what happened. I know how she hurt me but I don't understand why. She never told me. She just told me to move out and I did. I sent her an invite to my party with a note on back but I don't think that she ever saw it. Who knows. I'm sure some would say to forget her but I haven't forgotten anyone in my life. And I'm serious when I say that. I remember everyone good or bad that has come through my life. I'm wierd like that. What to do???????!!!!!!

It's been so long.

So it's been awhile since I've been here. I mostly blog on my web page but even then I'm not good at it. Living in Utah has it's ups and downs. Downs may be ending a friendship that was near and dear to you or having to deal with the loss of your dear grandfather and being far away. Ups may be creating new friends which I do so easily or even being closer to those that you don't get to see very often. I do wish I was in guatemala with my quierida familia, dear family, but soon I will and I can't wait for then. Life is amazing how much it changes in such short time. Wow! I am amazed every day!